In Ten Years

I was setting some goals the other day and I remembered some case management training I received when I was working for Goodwill that showed the most effective goals have tangible timelines. So I started thinking about long-term goals, where do I want to be in five years? Ten?

Then I realized that in ten years I'll be a month and a half away from my fortieth birthday.

And I'll have a teenager.

Then I had to stop.

How does life move so damn fast? How can (the average lifespan of) 70 years go so quickly and seem so long all at once?

I think I'll go cuddle my baby now because I'm pretty sure she'll be graduating from high school tomorrow.

Another Reason I Love Cloth...

This doesn't happen.

And while I know I'm committing a cardinal sin by having my sweater not cover my butt in my leggings, I'd like to defend myself by saying that my undershirt is much longer and I just failed to pull it down before the picture was taken.

Catching Up

I am just absolutely the pokey-est. I meant to do this on G's birthday but I didn't get around to it. Seriously, where does my time go?!

 

You'll notice he says his favorite movie is Chrsitmas Vacation - pretty sure that's based solely on the cartoon during the opening credits. He usually walks away after that.

 

Also, take a close look at the the "What do you think about..." questions. Wowsers. Talk about glass half empty - and parents that need improvement. I should probably be embarrassed to post this. Yes, I definitely am. But it's worth sharing just the same. I'm pretty proud of my creative formatting. Hahaa! I'm so lame.

 

The First First Day of the Rest of His Life

 "They're yours, and then they're the worlds." - Rob Lowe

This week, G started pre-school. Our church was starting a new program and the timing just seemed right. He and I need a break from each other. I was (am) the problem. My patience is thin. I'm harder on him than I should be. He seems so much bigger now than he did six months ago, and sometimes (very often) I forget that he's only (barely) three. I don't want this to become our ordinary, so I decided we needed a break. "It's not you, it's me," except for really, it is.

And though I knew we needed this break, and that he will have to grow up eventually, it didn't stop my heart from breaking knowing it was time to shove him out of the nest. At least that's how I felt.

The night before school started I remember thinking that the days of not having school constraints were over. Forever. Yes, there will be summer vacations, but it'll never quite be the same. From now until he leaves our home, we have to share him. It seems strange to me that you only get three or four short years to load your kid up on love and confidence and fun and strength before you have to send him or her out into the world and hope it doesn't destroy those things. This week, my sweet baby experienced the first first day of the rest of his life. There will be many of these, of course, but this was the first one.0

For weeks we've been discussing school, and for weeks he's been saying he's "nervous" about all the other kids. Luckily, it's a new program and so far it's just him and one other kid. They have an absolute blast and each time (three, thus far) I've picked him up he's screamed "NOOOOOOO!" or hidden under a table.

So I guess he likes it.

And so do I. It's nice to have time with just Piper. I thought I'd get more done around here while he was gone, but as it turns out, having one kid instead of two is no less time consuming, it's just that the time is less hectic. So... I've pretty much just done laundry. But I'll get better. Maybe.

Well, and I did shovel (half) the driveway today! So that's not nothin'...

Anyway, here are a few pics from my sweet baby's first day of school! Erik couldn't join us for drop off because he had to be at work super early, but I'm proud to report there were no tears! Despite the fact G said "Sorry I don't need you anymore Mommy," on the first day.

 

Pleas excuse the most horrific wallpaper on the planet.



Ready to play!

This is Why

I feel kind of silly blogging. I don't have a particularly interesting life, or earth shattering things to share. I don't have an angle, or a talent or eloquently stated ideas. My pictures aren't gorgeous and my background is plain. Hell, I'm not even as funny as I used to be. (Find my college blog - that was HILARIOUS!). So I don't really "advertise" the fact that I do this. Sometimes if I really want to get my thoughts "out there" I'll post the link on my Facebook, but for the most part, I don't think I do much to share this site with the world. I seriously don't even know if my own husband knows about or reads this.

And that's okay with me, because I don't do this for the world.

I do it to remember. Because I'm already forgetting.

And I do it for my kids. Because they won't remember. (which sometimes I'm grateful for...)

I'm not just a mom. I'm not just the person who packed lunches and cooked supper, cleaned up messes and gave baths. I have (usually pretty strong) opinions. I have thoughts that I don't say out loud (though those of you who know me well might find that pretty surprising). I want my children to look back on these posts and know who I was when I carved out a minute to be out from under my mom hat.

I read a super interesting article on the NPR website about memories. Basically that we plug current facts into into our memories. Think about your mom. How did she look when you were a kid? Because I put my moms current fifty-something-year-old face on the body I remember looking up at opening presents on her 33rd birthday (which, by the way, seemed positively ancient back then...).

Here's a quote from the article:
"Our memories aren't perfect," Voss says. "They're not like tape recorders. There's a small current of thought that thinks these failures aren't necessarily a bad thing. Memory is not intended to allow you to remember what you did last week, or remember your childhood. The point is to help you make good choices right now."

There you have it.

Our memories aren't made to remember the little things. But for me, my blog is.