You Do For Family

The other day I sat at lunch with my sister-in-law, overhearing a woman discussing how she "reconnected" with her brother in Wyoming after 25 years. She went on to say she was one of 9. (Hey, she was loud and was at the next table over). It got me thinking about all the people I know who've (for lack of better terminology) walked away from members of their family for one reason or another. My Grandma P had several siblings she didn't speak to because of the way things went down with her parents death and because I'd never really known any different, having estranged members of the family didn't seem all that out of the ordinary. And longer I go through life I realize that there are a LOT of people out there deliberately ignoring members of their family for one reason or another - myself included, obviously. I thought it was normal and not even really that sad. "People make their beds," I thought. I certainly know the reason I've walked away from members of my family - and hell, maybe they say the same thing about me.

If I were being honest, I would tell you that Erik nor I have very good relationships with our sisters. We're just not that much a like (or at all alike) and none of us have ever put in the effort to forge a relationship. Right or wrong, it is what it is. And up until recently I think we were all just fine with that. It occurred to me the other day sitting at lunch, that if you're one of 9 children and you choose to walk away from your crazy brother, you aren't missing out on much. But if you're one of TWO and you choose to walk away from your self-centered/free-spirited/pick-your-issue sister, just because you aren't appreciative of those qualities, well... that's just kind of ridiculous.

I looked across the table at my sister-in-law and we came to a mutual unspoken decision that we need to do better. We started discussing plans to make sure we all see each other more often because, as I put it, "we're all we have."

For awhile now I've been preaching to Grant that sometimes in life "We Do Hard Things." I like it as a motto for a military family. But maybe, just maybe, we need to change our little motto to "You do for family" because at the end of the day, if you don't have anyone to celebrate your "hard" successes with, what's the point?

I'll let you know how it goes.